What queer couples can teach others about non-monogamy

There have been a few articles recently about same-sex couples and how they express non-monogamy. The first, entitled Domestic Bliss?, was published in the New York Press. It focuses on the bucking of gender roles, but also on the ways that same-sex couples negotiate non-monogamy.

. . . the ways in which young, opposite-sex couples view marriage have changed substantially over the past several decades. And if the experts are right, then, as ironic as it may seem, it could turn out that these "conventional" couples may just happen to find their best role models for the sorts of marriages they want to construct for themselves by looking at those of pioneering same-sex marriages.

. . . negotiating outside of society's dictates and standards, something same-sex couples have been forced to do, allows each person to more clearly express and receive what they want and need in a relationship -- so the resulting relationship allows each person to be more truly themselves and satisfied about the things that matter most.

This piece includes a magnificent quote from Barbara Carrellas.

An open marriage might not be for you, but perhaps there is some other area in your marriage where you could use, to your benefit, the same tools that some other couple is using to negotiate their sexuality.

Another article published in The Advocate focuses on Dan Savage's term "monogamish," and how couples today are utilizing it. This piece asks, "Could the gay male tradition of open relationships actually alter marriage as we know it? And would that be such a bad thing?" and highlights several different relationships that have prospered under non-monogamy.

Interviewees wanted for book about parenting within non-traditional relationships

Sadie Smythe (blogger at Sadie's Open Marriage) is writing a book on parenting within non-traditional relationships, and she wants to hear from you!

As a parent living in an Open Marriage, the most-asked question I receive is, "What about your daughter?" So, I have decided to write a book that answers this question and all the others that go along with it. Questions such as "What do you tell her about your relationship?" and "How do you think it will affect her worldview?" and ohsomany more.

. . . So I am looking for others like me (and unlike me,) who have designed their relationship in a way that suits them, but which might be considered to fall outside of that traditional relationship paradigm -- married and living and parenting separately, unmarried and living next door to each other, polyamorous parenting, swinging parents, queer parents, transgendered parents, kinky moms and dads, etc. -- who would be interested in being interviewed and quoted in the book.

Interviews can be either anonymous or credited. Email Smythe at sadiessmythe [at] gmail [dot] com.

Mockumentary web series questions monogamy

A newly-launched mockumentary web series called The Monogamy Experiment is offering a fun, off-the-cuff look at open relationships. The series is about a young couple who decide to dabble in non-monogamy for 30 days.

The series is written, co-produced, and directed by actress Amy Rider (known for her role in The Secret Life of the American Teenager). Various members of the cast are known for their roles on CharmedThe Big Bang Theory, and Heroes.

More info about the series:

The Monogamy Experiment combines the genres of documentary and romantic comedy into a naturalistic mockumentary. A "too-young-to-get-married-yet" 20-something experiments on herself and her boyfriend to find the truth about whether we are truly monogamous or not before they head to the altar. The world of The Monogamy Experiment has a light but grounded tone, while everything about the acting indicates this is nothing less then a true documentary, comedic situations abound.

The Monogamy Experiment is about the human condition -- whether or not we can be pegged into the hole of being the type of animals who are biologically monogamous or not... or whether human emotions blur any ability to peg us into any category at all.

Here's the first episode:


Episodes two and three can be found on YouTube, with more to come. The Monogamy Experiment can also be followed on Twitter and Facebook.

[SSEXBBOX] seeks family photos of all kinds

Queer publication [SSEXBBOX] Magazine is working on a unique photo series called the "Family Portrait Project." Their call for submissions made me think of all the various poly configurations out there:

Based on the idea of classical family portraits the [SSEXBBOX] team is looking to put together an international photo series that highlights the new evolutionary paradigm of relationship dynamics. We would like you and your "family" to take a photograph and briefly explain to us how y'all relate to one another.

Need more inspiration? Think American Gothic, traditional wedding photographs, family reunion photographs, quinceanera photographs, Paris is Burning: House of Xtravaganza and House of Ninja, Flintstones meet the Jetsons, and the Cosbys in a blender with a splash of queer fairy energy, ice, and a dash of creativity.

Submitted photographs must be 300dpi and should be accompanied by a brief description of 30 words or less. Submissions and questions can be sent to magazine [at] ssexbbox [dot] com. The deadline is August 15, 2011.

[SSEXBBOX] can also be found on Facebook and Twitter.