Comments for OpeningUp.net

Comment on Poly takes the stage on The Good Men Project by Gregory Alan Elliott

Gregory Alan Elliott — Sun, 15 Apr 2012 01:12:02 +0000

Truthfully, and with a positive attitude… The more honest you are with your lover about what you want from them, the FEWER opportunities they will have to hurt you, AND the more faithful to you it is possible for them to be. “Honesty is the best poetry*” …living a fearless life full of kindness and compassion will not guarantee happiness, but will at least improve your self-respect… Which may lead to lots of friendships and lovers. :-)

Comment on Have you completed the polyamory and marriage survey? by deanna

deanna — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 00:09:57 +0000

It was still available today, and I took it. It seemed to assume that anyone answering was cohabiting with someone and had a “family.” Odd questions, considering the source.

Comment on Have you completed the polyamory and marriage survey? by William Van Vechten

William Van Vechten — Sat, 24 Mar 2012 01:16:05 +0000

Yay!

Comment on World premiere of Yes, We’re Open this Sunday by Thomas

Thomas — Fri, 09 Mar 2012 19:44:46 +0000

This looks fun with a nice happy ending! You are bringing this to Seattle, right?… I mean we’ve got more poly people up here than you have down there by a LOOOONG shot!! Like a really LOOOOONG shot. :)

Comment on Take the polyamory and marriage survey by Curvaceous Dee

Curvaceous Dee — Sun, 26 Feb 2012 21:32:42 +0000

Just a follow-on from my previous comment, to let you know I had a response from Dr Curt Bergstrand after emailing both researchers yesterday:

Hi Dee – Thank you so much for responding to our survey and giving us your insights into ways it can be improved next time. We completely agree with your criticisms, but we were pretty much stuck with the outdated wordings of some of the questions we used from pre-existing surveys so we have a basis for comparison. Our next survey will not have these problems and we hope you will participate in that one also.

I can accept the basis for comparison requirement – but I am also glad that it will be changing for the next survey :)

xx Dee

Comment on Take the polyamory and marriage survey by Brad

Brad — Sat, 25 Feb 2012 19:59:34 +0000

It almost looks like a replica of Bergstrand’s research on swingers, just focused on polyamory rather than swinging. Interesting to take the survey though.

Comment on Take the polyamory and marriage survey by Curvaceous Dee

Curvaceous Dee — Sat, 25 Feb 2012 19:51:54 +0000

It was an interesting survey, and I’m glad I took the time to fill it out.

However, I was sad to see that it made the assumption that both people taking it, and partners of people taking it, were of only two genders: male and female. As someone with a trans* partner; as someone who identifies as pansexual; and as someone who views gender broadly, at the very least the option of ‘other’ (however othering!) would have been a start.

I know you didn’t design the survey – but thought I’d note it here for anyone else planning to take it. I’ll also be emailing the researchers directly.

xx Dee

Comment on Non-monogamy on the cover of NYT Magazine by Nicci

Nicci — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 20:31:44 +0000

I think this is fantastic! I *heart* Dan Savage for being so open and no nonsense about ALL the issues that people face. And this is one is dear to me. I am in a “V” Polyamorous relationship. My partner and her other partner are both loving and wonderful people. Some days, it is an uphill battle with a range of emotions we are still learning to deal with. We have faced some pretty horrific responses to our lifestyle (one partner was severely injured by one person she told) but in general we believe as long as no one is being hurt, we are all honest, and we are all consenting – who should really care what our lifestyle is. We all realize that a monogamous relationship is not natural to humans. And things happen in life one can not explain – like falling in love with two people. How many “monogamous” married couples have extramarital affairs? I bet the percentage is fairly high. And with divorce rates being over 50% it becomes quite clear that monogamy is not always realistic. What we are doing is not unusual – with the exception that all of us are “in the know” and that is so much nicer than being suspicious, jealous, sneaking, lying, or anything else that goes along with fighting to be in a monogamous relationship. I believe the reality is that “couples” who find themselves in a fully-invested-100% monogamous-until-death-do-us-part kind of relationship are actually the rarity. People need to stop lying to themselves and judging others (like us) all the while being hypocritical. I am so glad to see this topic coming out in the open. Hurray!

Comment on Play about an open relationship premieres this week in Ottawa by Nadine Thornhill

Nadine Thornhill — Wed, 15 Jun 2011 19:47:49 +0000

Dear Tristan,

I am a huge, HUGE fan! I clicked over here during one of my regular visits to your site and I swear I just about fainted when I saw this post! Thank you so much for taking the time to promote our show and for inspiring my writing with your incredible work!

Comment on Tristan on the Michael Baisden Radio Show! by Melinda

Melinda — Fri, 10 Jun 2011 16:24:52 +0000

You finally said what I have been saying for YEARS! I was VERY impressed! I hope EVERYONE reads the book, if for nothing else, to DEFINE themselves and live in truth!