Dec 302015
 

Participants needed for Qualitative Study

Vanilla and Kink: Married Couples in Which One Partner Identifies as a Part of the BDSM Culture and the Other Partner Does Not.

Looking for a legally married couple:

  • At least 18 years of age
  • Married for at least 1 year (including open-marriage and other variations)
  • Male and female partnered marriage
  • Speak and write English language fluently
  • One partner self-identifying as a part of the BDSM culture/community for at least 1 year and the other partner self-identifying as not specifically BDSM (including vanilla, kinky but not identifying as BDSM, etc. )
  • Not currently pregnant or experiencing psychosis or suicidal ideation

Due to the limited time and resources, this particular study focuses the above specific population. Future research will include a variety of types of committed relationships, sexual orientations, etc.

For questions or interest in participation, contact:
Catherine Meyer, MA, LMFT #88224, Cmeyer2 [at] alliant.edu
Supervised by Hao-Min Chen, Ph.D., Hmchen [at] alliant.edu

Goal of this study is to understand how married couples communicate and negotiate the rules, roles, and expectations about their sexual relationship when one partner identifies with the BDSM culture and the other does not.

All identifying information will be kept confidential.

I’m currently seeking 20 female and male individuals who are interested in speaking about their experiences of being in a marriage in which one partner identifies being in the BDSM culture and the other does not. The interviews are part of a doctoral dissertation study (entitled Vanilla and Kink: Married Couples in Which One Partner Identifies as a Part of the BDSM Culture and the Other Partner Does Not?) which is required to fulfill the requirements for the doctoral degree of the Couple Family Therapy Program at Alliant International University, Irvine campus. The project supervisor for this study is Hao-Min Chen, Ph.D. The study is interested in learning about and understanding how married couples communicate and negotiate the rules, roles, and expectations about their sexual relationship when one partner identifies with the BDSM culture and the other does not. Criteria for participation includes the following: at least 18 years of age, male and female partnered marriage, ability to speak and write the English language fluently, self-report being a part of the BDSM community for at least 1 year, be in a marriage for at least 1 year (inclusive of open-marriage), and not currently pregnant or experiencing psychosis or suicidal ideation. Interested individuals will be asked to fill out a short demographic questionnaire (about 5 minutes to complete) and participate in an interview, which will last approximately 60-90 minutes. Please note that participation in the study is voluntary. If you choose to participant in the study, I will be removing your name and any other identifying information from the final document to conceal your identity. If you are interested in being interviewed for the study and/or would like more information, then please contact me by email or phone so we can discuss, in more detail, the purpose and the process of the study. —Catherine Meyer, MA, LMFT

Dec 222015
 

ComeSeeMe
Come see Tristan at SHE Sexual Health Expo in Los Angeles January 16-17, 2016. Featuring today’s leaders in sex, intimacy and romance, SHE will deliver a crash course in understanding modern sexual relationships with must-attend workshops and captivating intimacy product showcases — all with the chic backdrop of its stylish venues. Sex experts include Amy Jo Goddard, Elle Chase, Charlie Glickman, Mollena Williams, Allison Moon, Reid Mihalko, Rachel Kramer Bussel, Chris Donaghue, and many more.

Tristan’s appearances will all be on Saturday, January 16. Her schedule is:

4:30-5:20 pm Designing Your Open Relationship Workshop
Are you considering an open relationship? Does your current open relationship need some tweaking? There are few established scripts or visible role models for open relationships, so people in them can struggle without support and guidance. In this interactive workshop, relationship expert and author of Opening Up, Tristan Taormino gives practical advice on how to craft responsible, fulfilling nonmonogamous relationships. Tristan will explore common myths, real-life benefits and challenges, and how to decide if an open relationship is right for you. She will share some of the most common styles of open relationships-from partnered nonmonogamy to solo polyamory-and discuss how to customize them to meet your individual needs and wants. Through creative exercises, you’ll learn to articulate what you want, identify and negotiate limits and boundaries, communicate with your partner(s) in productive ways, and create relationships that work for you.

5:30-6:00 pm Booksigning
Tristan will be signing her books Opening Up, The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women, The Ultimate Guide to Kink, 50 Shades of Kink, Anal Sex Position Guide, and Secrets of Great G-Spot Orgasms and Female Ejaculation. The books will be for sale from The Pleasure Chest booth.

6:00 pm Mix & Meet
Tristan will be on hand to meet with attendees, plus she’ll have her books and other products for sale.

Hilton Universal City Hotel, Los Angeles, CA
Admission: Tickets are $25 each, buy them at Eventbrite. Get 2-for-1 tickets when you use promotional code TRISTANT.

Jun 112012
 

Sex and relationship educator Reid Mihalko (of ReidAboutSex) has put out a call for participants to be filmed this Friday night, June 15th, in downtown Los Angeles for a major TV show documenting his swinging workshop and play party. He is looking for 10-15 couples, both new to non-monogamy and experienced, who are willing to be filmed for Part2 Pictures. The film crew are also in need of one newbie couple who are interested in swinging but not yet sold on it.

The night will begin at 6:30 p.m. with Reid’s two-hour “Plays Well With Others” workshop (which teaches communication and relationship skills for non-monogamous folks), followed by a quick dinner break, and finally, “My First Play Party.” Part2 Pictures will document the workshop and the play party, but they won’t be filming any explicit nudity. They will also interview willing attendees.

Reid’s goal is to showcase ethical non-monogamy in a positive light on national television. He says:

For those of you who know me and know how passionate I am about the media covering sex-positive life in an empowering way with integrity, please know that I used to be a film producer and worked in television years ago, and that I’ve have several conversations with the producers of this show (you’ve probably seen or heard of it, btw), and the producers are letting me design the event and influence how they’re going to document it. This way, I can ensure that they have footage and soundbites that will showcase The Lifestyle in a positive and informative way.

Read more, including full descriptions of the workshop and play party, at Reid’s site. If you wish to RSVP, email Rachael Profiloski at Part2 Pictures at rachael [at] part2pictures [dot] com or call her at 718-797-0581.

May 222012
 

Writing for the new community blog Awesome Women of Twitter, The Righteous Harlot — whose personal blog features the tagline the messy back end of an open relationship — contributed a post entitled “As In, To Swing?

It’s a sort-of run-down of how she came to be in an open relationship with her partner, Virgil (she doesn’t really identify as a swinger). She also includes some of the lessons she’s learned so far about being open:

If you’re going to be happy in an open relationship you have to be open to more than just your partner having sex [or relationships] with other people. You have to be open to life and to allowing lots of things to be fluid and less certain. This is probably the hardest bit, to be honest.

You also have to sort your shit out and work out what you actually want from your relationships rather than what society has taught you is your right to expect.

Don’t give a shit about other people and what they might think. A lot of people will have a pretty simplistic knee-jerk reaction to the idea. It’s your life. Make your own choices.

Read the rest at Awesome Women of Twitter.

Jan 182012
 

In Dan Savage’s recent Savage Love column, entitled “Meet the Monogamish,” he hopes to squash the stereotype that non-monogamy is a recipe for disaster — by simply sharing the stories of non-monogamous folks. Savage writes,

Why do most people assume that all nonmonogamous relationships are destined to fail? Because we only hear about the ones that do. If a three-way or an affair was a factor in a divorce or breakup, we hear all about it. But we rarely hear from happy couples who aren’t monogamous, because they don’t want to be perceived as dangerous sex maniacs who are destined to divorce.

. . . “You know lots of couples who have had three-ways and flings who aren’t divorced,” I told the skeptics a few weeks ago, “you just don’t know you know them.” In an effort to introduce the skeptics to some happily monogamish couples, I invited coupled people who’d had successful flings, affairs, three-ways, and swinging experiences to write in and share their stories.

Seven different letters are printed, ranging from threesomes to semi-open relationships. One reader writes in succinctly:

I agree with you that we rarely hear about successful marriages that are open. How do I know? I just discovered that my parents are swingers — and they have been married for 26 years!

Read the rest of the stories in Savage Love.

Jul 082011
 

Lionsgate Television, the company that created dark comedy Weeds, has a new project in the works. It’s called Bedroom Community, and it’s a reality TV show about suburban swingers. Notably, the focus will be on the swingers’ day-to-day lives and their relationship dynamics, not what happens in the bedroom.

Producer Eli Frankel says,

The world of swingers is mythologized in American pop culture, but very few people outside of it have seen it . . . What we have seen on shows about swingers are primarily older hippies . . . What we found are elite groups of people in upscale communities who are good-looking and have money and access. That glossy version is much more interesting to watch.

Casting was a somewhat difficult process, Frankel explains, as he had to convince participants that the show would not be exploitative.

Lionsgate is currently shopping the project around to cable networks.

 Swinging  Comments Off on Lionsgate planning reality show about swingers  Tagged with:
Mar 232011
 

Tonight’s episode of Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, entitled “Bombshell,” has an interesting premise: two detectives are assigned to investigate criminal activity at a “swingers’ club.”

The Woodhull Foundation is hoping that viewers will tune in to the show and submit their responses to it on the foundation’s website.

While we have not seen the episode, we have apprehension that it may feature gratuitous demonizing and sensational characterizations of swingers and others involved in the swinging lifestyle . . . help us review the show as we consider any possible response we may wish to make to the network.

The episode airs tonight, Wednesday, at 10 pm ET on NBC. Submit your thoughts on the Woodhull Foundation’s website.