How to tackle common arguments

Have you ever wished you had a more articulate response to ill-informed arguments about non-monogamy? Bobbu of UK poly blog Polytical wrote a great post about the responses he has formulated over the years for the following arguments:

  • "It's just an excuse for sleeping around"
  • "You're young, it's just a phase"
  • "Don't you ever think you'll ever settle down?"
  • "It's not natural"
  • "It's not normal"
  • "You can only love one person"

For example, in response to the "It's not normal" argument, Bobbu writes:

The person who puts this argument forward is likely to have no actual idea of what “normal” is. Philosophy has a whole field dedicated to trying to figure out what it is, and what kind of effect it has in the world. In the thousands of years of trying to get a clear picture, we’ve had very little luck.

This is mostly because people change so much, and their cultures along with them. Once upon a time slavery was normal; at another time worshipping multiple deities; at another it was perfectly fine to kill someone for stealing some bread. So if you’re going to try to argue that I shouldn’t do something because it’s not normal right now, it’s probably best you take a step back and look at the sort of precedents you’ve got there.

Check out the full post on Polytical.

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