2013 so far: poly reading list

A lot has happened so far in 2013! Although I try to keep abreast of the latest news, sometimes articles fall through the cracks. So here's a list of interesting stuff that wasn't covered on this blog -- but is totally worth a read!

Help fund a new book on open relationships

Samantha Fraser, educator and blogger at Not Your Mother's Playground who I've written about before, is in the process of writing a new guide to open relationships -- and she needs your help to make it a reality.

An Indiegogo campaign for the book is in full swing, and ends in just one week. Funds raised will go toward printing the book, paying editors and designers, shipping, and a launch party.

Having been in a successful open marriage since 2006, Fraser hopes to bring her unique experience to the table to publish a book that is relatable, honest, and useful.

Not Your Mother’s Playground: A realistic guide to honest, happy and healthy open relationships (NYMP) is a book on modern open relationships aimed at a new generation, discussing everything from swinging to polyamory (multiple loves). It includes personal triumphs and challenges mixed in to give it a relatable, intimate feel.

. . . The idea behind Not Your Mother’s Playground is to walk the reader through everything they will encounter should they choose to open up their relationship. It will show all sides from the good to the bad, not ignoring the reality that these relationships come with complications that can put even the strongest couples to the test.

Here's the video from the Indiegogo page:

Depending on the dollar amount of contribution, those who donate can be rewarded with tweets, ebooks, printed copies of the book, thank you cards, and even coaching sessions.

Donate today and spread the word!

Non-monogamous blogger lays out the facts

Samantha Fraser, blogger at Not Your Mother's Playground, was interviewed for an article on non-monogamy in The Grid, an online city magazine run by the Toronto Star. The piece is decent, but the author spends a lot of time stressing how complicated, confusing, and exhausting non-monogamy seems.

Fraser wasn't too bothered by the coverage, but she did take the opportunity to clear up some things that the article left murky. In the process, she wrote a blog post more useful than the original article.

To be honest, the only issue that I have with it is that it seems to focus on the fact that -- a few months into non-monogamy I struggled extra with the little details -- like the visual cue of my husband’s date's wine glass being left behind in my kitchen. When we were relatively fresh other people fuckers, silly shit like that was hard to handle. So I share those stories with other people because those are the things that threw me for a loop back in the day. A few commenters on the article have latched onto the wine glass story, suggesting that if I’m not comfortable with that then I must not really be happy with non-monogamy at all.

And this is a mild challenge I always see that, for the most part, I ignore. There are a lot of assumptions out there about open relationships. First of all, people will often react strongly when they hear someone is in one. "Isn't that hard? What about jealousy? What if you fall in love?". On the flip side however, if I suggest mySELF that non-monogamy is hard and that sometimes those questions can have really tough answers, then I obviously must not be happy with it.

. . . I find this attitude so ridiculous which is why I will constantly strive to be honest when discussing open relationships . . . However in the interest of clarity, I will list a few points here that maybe I haven't said in some time.

Read Fraser's list of things she has personally learned from practicing non-monogamy.